I was sure I could take this guy....if it really came down to it....he didn't look too tough. Sure, I haven't been in too many fights before (well, actually I hadn't been in ANY fights, unless you count that time Lee kicked my ass for swiping one of his baseball cards), but this guy could go down with a swift kick in the balls. Even a big a-hole like that would buckle to a foot in the crotch.
"Excuse me," I said, finally getting up the courage to go up to him again.
"Huh?" he said, looking up from the video monitor. He must have been watching that thing for ten minutes. Yeah, I was pretty sure I could do that, kick him in the 'nads if I needed to and then run like hell out of there with the...
"Do you have the time?" I asked Sammy. I knew his name because of his little name badge.
"Yeah," he said looking down at his watch. I looked over on the counter – there it was again. Still there. Still within reach....this was just too much of a sign....I couldn't blow an opportunity like this....!
"It's a quarter 'til four," he said, looking up at me. He had a glazed, dead look most slaves in retail get about that time in the afternoon. I hoped I never had to do that!
God! There it was....right within reach. If only Gavin was here....he could help....but then that would be defeating the purpose. "Thanks," I said, fumbling for another excuse for him to look away.
During the rest of that long, hot summer Gavin and I continued to define and redefine our roles. While I didn't relish the idea of being spanked by a preteen, I never really objected after the experience because it was always fair (at least I thought so), and it was also far less regular than you would imagine – two things I couldn't really say about the times I went over Dad's lap. He seemed to spank me all of the _d_a_m_n_ time, Dad that is, for just about any and everything. I never imagined that I could miss that.
Hmmmm?
Even though Gavin wasn't as ruthless as Dad was, my father didn't seem to object one way or another. In fact, he seemed less and less enamored with Gavin as the long days went on, and had (pretty much) stopped showing an active interest in the times Gavin had to spank me. Sometimes, I thought, Dad seemed out and out depressed, which was odd. He was not someone who got that way, and yet...well, he seemed to be.
The only thing I could think of was that he missed spanking me, and was regretting our decision to let Gavin be the guardian of my butt. Common sense told me I was reading too much into that, though – " thinking about it too much," as my Social Studies teacher says whenever we tried to over-think a common sense question. Still, with Dad, I couldn't help myself. Seeing him moping around the house, looking tense and grumpy only made things worse.
Especially since all I could do was think about HIM and spanking and ME and more (and more and more) when I masturbated too! Oh my GOD!! It was becoming less and less about Gavin (and those beautiful memories of the bath tub) and now it seemed like I was almost totally fixated on FATHER. And best of all, I was no longer concerned if I was a freak and going to hell.
Guilt - schmilt!
I guess I figured that it felt too good to care, then maybe hell was worth it!!
One of my prominent fantasies involved Dad getting frustrated at both me and Gavin, and spanking us both. In the fantasy, I would usually be the one getting spanked first (by Dad), then he would take Gavin over his lap and I could watch, while standing there naked rubbing my butt. I had filed away everything about that day in Atlantic City when Dad really did spank my friend, that it made this a really easy fantasy to visualize.
Oooooh, man!
That was sweet!
I really wish Dad had a video camera for that!
Luckily, I remembered everything. From Gavin's screaming for mercy like the little child he was, to Dad's peaceful, almost Saint Like expression during and after, it was one of the happiest moments in my entire life; so much so, that it was the active fuel in my favorite _s_e_x_ual fantasy. It didn't take long either....I usually got off before Dad finished with Gavin's butt!!!
WOOOOSH!
It would be such a blazing, white-hot intensive rush of pleasure. Something I can't even explain, but something I have lived for repeating again every morning and night.
That particular fantasy was far less disturbing to me than the one about the guy at the public bathroom I kept having. Whenever I thought about that one, and what it might mean, I really frightened myself. Of all of the new experiences I was having that special summer, having vivid fantasies about a stranger in the JC Penny's bathroom shook me to the core.
Thank goodness for Gavin! As much as he could have abused his situation, I really didn't feel he did. At least not at this point - I could see where there might be potential, but for now, I was positive that he cared about me, as a brother cares for another brother, or a father cares for a son. This was actually pretty funny, because I too had paternal/brotherly feelings towards him.
He was the constant that summer. He was what kept me grounded, whenever I felt like I was losing my sanity. He was the wind beneath my mother-_f_u_c_k_ing wings.
No matter what you might think, having read up to now, spanking ME was not the only activity Gavin and I did to keep ourselves busy! On days when we had run out of things to do around the house or neighborhood or the public swimming pool, and we were tired of playing with Vincent or Lee or Angela or Tony, we would go to the mall. Neither of us really were into the mall "scene," but it was a good way to blow through a few hours, sometimes more if we took in a movie or two.
Our tastes in movies were all over the map. Both of us liked that new STAR WARS movie, even if we thought that Jar Jar Binks was annoying and Anakin deserved a spanking for being such a little whiner.
"I think more people would like the movie if Anakin got his bare bottom spanked!" Gavin said, with an all too knowing look on his face. Ahh, yes. My young apprentice was learning. I felt so Obi-Wanish.
Before STAR WARS came out, Gavin had begged and begged me to take him to the new AUSTIN POWERS movie. I told him that, since it was PG-13, he couldn't go.
"But I thought you wanted to see it too?" he complained.
"Maybe I'll ask Lee to go with me," I said with a smirk.
"That's not funny," Gav said, slapping my elbow.
"If we want we can try and sneak you in," I told him, "but only if you promise not to spank me because I broke the rules!!" I was half serious. I didn't really think he would do that, but I would have to be blind not to notice that he was starting to enjoy his job a little more than he should. Just a little....
"I promise, Matt," he said, sheepishly.
"Pinky swear?" I said, sticking my pinky out.
"Pinky swear," he said, as he smiled at me with that....that....that smile. A smile to melt your heart.
The movie was kind of dumb but Gavin loved it. For weeks he kept imitating the character "Fat Bastard" by repeating, "Get In My BELLY!" whenever we saw an overweight person. He knew it embarrassed me, but he also knew I could never really be upset with him - did I mention how cute Gavin is, by the way?
Dad took the two of us to go see SIXTH SENSE. Now that was an excellent movie! Have you seen it? I mean, have YOU seen it? What a great, spooky little movie. Really reminds me of an old film I once saw on television called THE OTHER....but I digress. I don't want to give anything away in case you haven't seen it yet, let's just say that little Hayley Osmont was da bomb!
About half way through the movie, there's this scene where Hayley is in his underpants. During one moment you get an excellent view of his cute little butt through his tight underwear.
Gavin reached over and whispered to me, "I'd like to spank him too!"
I smiled at my friend and nodded; who wouldn't want to spank that adorable tight ass? Hell, the Dali Lama would want to paddle that fanny. A bottom that perfect is going to waste not having someone spank it on a regular basis.
(((swoon))))
By the time August rolled around Gavin and I had exhausted all of the decent movies out there. When we saw INSPECTOR GADGET we realized Hollywood had given up entertaining us.
"I can't believe there is nothing playing!" Gavin whined one hot and nasty Saturday, as he looked through the newspaper. "Mom said I could take my friends to the movies for my birthday but there's nothing playing."
"We can go see IRON GIANT?"
"Please," Gavin said making the 'W' sign with his two hands. "So gay....so very gay."
"There has to be something," I said.
"The SOUTH PARK movie is still playing!" he said.
"Do you think your folks will let us all go see that movie?" I asked. "They won't even let you watch the TV show."
"I know," he sighed. "This bites."
"We don't have to go to a movie, dude," I said. "We can go to Chuck-E-Cheeses!" I added, in a sing song voice.
"Ahhhh, clue phone for Mr. Grey," he said, making a sign of a telephone with his hand.
"What?" I asked. "You don't want to go to Chuck E. Cheeses, where a kid can be a kid??"
"That place is for infants," he muttered.
"Oooohh, the baby is too big for pizza and games," I teased, grabbing him by the chin. He batted my hand away; he hated it when I treated him like a child. "Man, you are in a crabby mood," I said, standing up. "You should be thrilled. You aren't going to be 10 anymore."
"Yeah, well, big whoop," he said, pouting. "No one is going to _f_u_c_k_ing respect me any more as an 11 year old."
"Ahh, hello," I said, raising my hand. "Clue phone for you, buddy. I was just teasing just then. We do that from time to time, you can I. You need to take a joke a little better."
He glared at me. "I'm just sick of everyone treating me like a - like a little baby."
"Um," I said, giving him a confused look. "I believe that I don't do that, Gav, and I sure as hell don't believe Father does either."
"Well, that's different," he said standing up. "I should go home."
"Don't you want to go to the mall?" I asked.
"Nah," he shrugged. "I'm just going to go home. I'll call you later."
Even though I didn't have to babysit him on Saturdays, we still spent most every one together, so it felt weird to have the day without him. I wasn't sure what was bugging him; I felt that if he wanted to tell me, he would. I would just let him go and be gloomy for the afternoon and by Sunday he would be back to his old self again.
After he left I called Lee to see if he wanted to go to the mall, but there wasn't any answer over at his house.
_d_a_m_n_! I hated only having two friends!
"Dad!" I called upstairs. "Can you take me to the mall?"
"What's wrong with your legs?" he yelled down.
"They're broken!" I yelled up. "I broke them sking Mt. Everest. It really stinks. I think they might be infected or something..."
That usually got a laugh out of him, but he was also in a gloomy mood I didn't even hear a chuckle. He came on downstairs without saying anything.
"It's just gotten really hot out there, Dad," I said, more seriously. "It's like over ninety degrees."
"Will you need a lift home?"
"No," I said. "It should be cool enough by the time I leave."
"I don't want you there too late."
"I won't," I said, nodding my head. "I'll be home by six."
"Is Gavin going?"
"No," I sighed. "He's at home brooding."
"You two get into a fight?"
"Nah," I shook my head. "Not really. He's just upset that he's turning eleven next week."
Dad smiled at that one and actually laughed. "Why?" he asked.
"Not sure," I said, adding a shrug. "Maybe he wants to grow up faster, or maybe he's wishing to stay a little boy forever."
Dad laughed again. "Boy, you scare me sometimes." He picked up his keys.
"Hey, I watch a lot of daytime television. What can I say?" I laughed, before adding. "Actually makes me MISS school!"
"So, you gonna get him a birthday gift?"
"Gavin? Yeah, but I'm not sure what," I answered as the two of us made our way to the car. "He wants this cool video game that isn't out yet. Other than that. I really don't know."
With only a week left, his mother had to plan the perfect party for her boy, and I had to find a decent birthday present. Even if FINAL FANTASY VIII was out, I doubt I could have afforded it for Gav - things were so tight with me, financially, since a portion of my babysitting money that summer had to go to Dad to pay for cleaning the rugs in the living room and dining room.
When we got to the mall I thought about asking Dad for some extra cash, but it was kind of a pride thing. Us Grey men; three things we have in common – a love of spankings, kissing on the forehead and pride.
I walked around looking and looking for something for Gavin. It was then that I realized that I really didn't know him as well as I thought. I stopped into Suncoast. Would he like a movie on video? Hell I didn't even know if he or his family had a VCR. I looked around for a moment, and shrugged. Maybe he would like a compact disc?
On my way to Sam Goody I walked right past a software store. I knew he liked video games, but the only one he really talked about wanting was the one that wasn't even out. I kept on walking and figured that would be my last ditch effort, if I didn't find any decent compact disc.
Ok, so did he like The Backstreet Boys? Bare Naked Ladies? Bauhaus? Beck? Brittany? Blink 182? I stood back from the "B"s remembering something he said about liking the group Hanson, but then recalled he was talking about his little friend, Vincent.
Maybe he likes Pokemon cards! I suddenly thought. What kid during the summer of 1999 doesn't like Pokemon cards?!
I walked out of there back down to the software store, remembering seeing a sign in their window saying that they had Pokemon cards. Just because I didn't understand what the he'll they were doesn't mean that I didn't know they were the hottest thing since the Magic Cards I was into two years earlier. I was sure he wasn't too cool to have Pokemon cards!
I walked in and went up to the counter. There were only a few people in there; the cashier ("Sammy") and two kids he was watching playing a video game.
"Excuse me," I said, only slightly breaking Sammy's deep train of thought. "Do you have Pokemon cards?"
"Does the sign out there say we do?" he said, not looking at me.
"Yeah," I said, casually glancing behind the register.
"Then we must."
"Oh," I said, as my mouth dropped. "Thanks."
I took a number of steps back....
Was that....?
Could it have been....?
It can't be....?
I took the same number of steps back to the counter. "Excuse me?" I said. "How much are they?"
He told me....I didn't pay attention....I was focused on what was sitting there....opened....exposed....just inches away....so close I could touch it....grab it....TAKE it....!
YIKES!
I quickly walked out of the store shaking. I couldn't believe what was there – an actual copy of FINAL FANTASY VIII!! Sure, it was marked, "Not For Sale - For Promotional Use Only" on the cover, but I was sure it was the complete game. I had heard that they do that sort of _s_h_i_t_.
Oh man....oh man, man, man, man, MAN!
Maybe Sammy would sell it to me, even though it said not for sale, I thought. I knew the answer before I even finished the question. Not a chance in hell, and even if he did, I didn't have the money.
Hmmmmmmm...
That only left one thing, but I couldn't do it. I mean, I guess I could, but I shouldn't do it. But it was for a friend....that's different right? And it's not like they are going to make any money off of that anyway, right? It is for promotion, so they can't turn around and....
NO!
I wouldn't do it....but....but....
I knew I would....!
(If I could...!)
I stayed outside of the store for about ten minutes, transfixed on Sammy, who was transfixed on the video game he was watching.
I was sure I could take this guy....if it really came down to it....he didn't look too tough. Sure, I haven't been in too many fights before, but he could go down with a swift kick in the nuts. Even a big fatty would buckle to a shoe in the old bean bags.
"Get in my BELLY!" my inner voice suddenly said as I looked at Sammy; surprisingly it sound just like Gavin!
"Excuse me," I said, finally getting up the courage to go back up to him.
"Huh?" Sammy said, looking up from the video game. He looked annoyed that his concentration was broken.. Yup, I was certain I could make this happen!
"Do you have the time?" I asked.
"Yeah," he said looking down at his watch. I looked over on the counter – there it was. This was a sign!
"It's a quarter 'til four," he said, looking up at me with that glazed retail look in his eyes.
"Thanks," I said, adding, "Do you guys have a bathroom here?" There! That would be my opportunity....!
"No," he said, as my hopes were crushed. He just looked right at me, and pointed into the mall. "The closest public restroom is the one over at JC Pennys."
Suddenly the hairs on the back of my neck stood up....