The next day Paul returned home from school and, as I had ordered him the previous night and reminded him in the morning, had gone straight to his room and stripped to his briefs. As I had told him to do he had selected his black tanga briefs that morning. He came downstairs and sat at the kitchen table and began his homework. I had told him always to finish his homework before any leisure activity, including television.
I arrived home about an hour and a half later to find Paul, clad in tight fitting black tangas, watching a kids' programme on television. He said hello and after my initial reply I asked if he had had any homework to do. He replied he had to do some geography and an essay. I instructed him to show me his work. His geography homework had been done well, Paul had correctly identified the capitals of all the countries in the European Union, the rivers on which they stood, and the main economic features of the countries.
I then turned to the essay. Paul had written a story about a young boy who was very unhappy at home but who had befriended a man much older than himself. They did things together much the same as a father and son would. In the story the fictional boy and his friend were quite obviously based on the relationship Paul and I had. I asked Paul if he had had us in mind when he had written the story and with an embarrassed downward glance he had confirmed he had. I asked him if he was as unhappy at home as the boy in the story and he said he was. I asked why and he told me his dad had been very strict with him for as long as he could remember. He was always being punished for poor work at school, for being home late (even by a few minutes), in fact he thought sometimes his dad just found excuses to punish him severely. I referred to the punishment I had administered the previous evening and asked if his dad punished him as severely as that. Paul replied in the negative but went on to say that he felt I had punished him "with love" as he put it.
My curiosity aroused I asked Paul if he could remember the first time his dad had punished him. Paul had said that he was 8 when he had his first proper punishment. I asked what he meant by proper and he said the first time his dad had not just spanked him on his bum with his hand. Paul volunteered the information that even at 4 or 5 his dad had always spanked him on the bare bum, making him take down his trousers and underpants, before placing him over his knee. Even at that early age the spankings were severe, often as many as 8 firm slaps were administered. I felt that extremely harsh treatment to give a boy so young. I could not imagine what Paul meant by a proper punishment, having endured such treatment whilst still at infants school.
I asked Paul to tell me the circumstances of his first "proper" punishment. He told me he had been playing at a friend's house, in the garden. The football he and his friend were playing with had been kicked over the fence into the garden next door. Paul and his friend had run round the house and gone into the neighbours garden. The neighbour had seen the boys and shouted. In their panic to escape they had stepped into a flower bed trampling down some blooms. Paul's friend, Steven, had been beaten by his father who had then phoned Paul's dad and told him what had happened. Paul was ordered to return home straight away. He had run home and his father had met him in the street. His dad had been walking to Steven's house almost as fast as Paul was running from it. Paul was told in a very loud voice that he was going to get the hiding of his life. It was summer and many people were out and about and Paul said he remembered being very embarrassed that everyone knew he was going to get whacked.
Indoors, Paul was told to take off his footwear. He was then told to go to his bedroom and remove every stitch of clothing and wait for his dad's command. He had stripped and sat, naked, on his bed for what seemed like forever but was in fact about 45 minutes. He then heard his dad come up the stairs and enter the master bedroom. He had heard a cupboard door open and close. He was then told to go to his dad's room and on entering had seen his father standing in the centre of the room flexing a long bamboo cane with a crooked handle. He was ordered to lay flat, face down, on the bed with hands and legs outstretched. The cane had then been bought down onto his backside about 12 times, Paul recalled. I was shocked by this revelation and asked Paul if there had been many other punishments and his reply shocked me to the core. Apparently his dad had beaten him virtually every week, with varying degrees of severity, sometimes one or two strokes sometimes many, many more from that day on. A variety of instruments had been used. Paul told me of one occasion when he was about 11 when he had been whipped, yes with an actual whip, by his dad in front of some friends who had been playing with him in the house. I told Paul I thought I could understand his essay and told him to go upstairs and put his clothes on. He smiled and thanked me. I said he could tell me about the punishment with the whip whenever he wanted to if he felt it would help. He said he would tell me about it sometime because he wanted me to know why he wanted, so badly, for me to assume the role of his father.
He had still made no move to go upstairs and get dressed that I told him again I felt he had learnt his lesson and he could go and clothe himself. I also said I was sorry the punishment of the previous day had been so severe. Paul told me it was OK as he had deserved it and once again said it had been given with love. He then got up out of his chair, came over to me and gave me a big hug. Only then did he turn around and trot up the stairs to his bedroom to put his clothes back on. For my part I felt this poor kid, who had been so cruelly treated by his dad, needed my support and love more than eve