Todd leaned against the wall of the elevator and closed his eyes. What was happening to him? He very nearly understood and agreed with what that old lady was talking about....she had fogged his brain so much with her petting that she was starting to make sense. When he opened his eyes, he was looking up into the mirrored ceiling of the elevator. The face that stared back down on him had tears sliding down his face. Brushing them away Todd pushed the button for the garage. He was completely disgusted with himself. Since when did he care about what some old lady said, or that some jerk got his face smashed? Since he came here he'd become a puss. That little voice was growing louder and it said he cared a lot.
Taking his time in the garage. He put on his coveralls and he cleaned up his area, working on both bikes some, trying to get in as much wrench time as he could before 6 o'clock. He toyed with the idea of just staying down here all night but each time he moved the material of his overalls stretched against very sensitive skin giving him a gentle reminder of what pushing Jared too far could cost him. His bottom didn't hurt so much any more, it was just a little tender now, but he was not up to another go-around with Jared's belt. In fact he never wanted to feel that thing again.
Todd was irritated and confused that he wasn't more upset....well, he was mad....and he was not. He hated being treated like a child....like a....a brat. That's what Jared called him. It did anger him. Yet Todd no longer felt that boiling anger in his gut towards Jared that he had this morning. He admitted to himself that the anger was really directed at himself. Looking back on this morning, he knew he'd been a real asshole and hitting Mouse was an accident. He could see Jared's point on that but to give him....a....the word alone twisted his guts....a spanking and with his belt. He didn't know how he felt about that....shouldn't he hate the man for it or at the very least be pissed off. He was tired and his temper was strangely diminished. There was something else there but he couldn't put a name to it. What he did know was that he was very confused. It made his head hurt thinking about all this. Todd tried to tell himself that he was just tired from his workout with Deek and of course fighting Jared....another miserable mess his temper got him into.
"That was _f_u_c_k_'n brilliant," he muttered with a healthy dose of self-deprecation. Neither one of those excuses rang up to more than that, an excuse. Round and round his mind worked trying to target a reason for his..... depressed mood. Finding no answers to his questions and not really wanting to look any deeper, Todd just shoved the whole mess in the back of his crowded mind someplace. It was a quarter to six so he put up his tools. It rankled that he wouldn't be back for three days. What was he going to do with all that time on his hands? There was an odd sense of panic as he took a last look. Not since he left Arkansas, did he ever have any restrictions from his bike or tools, other than from money or injury. The idea of his bike being locked away from him nearly brought a panic attack. The clock on the wall ticked away the minutes....he had only a few before it was 6:00, the fear of an angry tank and longer restrictions made Todd give in and shut off the lights. Todd took the private elevator back to the penthouse. He stepped into the foyer right at 6:00. He could hear Jared in the kitchen and walked that way.
Looking up from the steaks he'd been marinating, he found a sullen Todd leaning on the hallway wall, his coveralls stripped to the waist, his upper body in just white tank, grimy from working in the garage. The boy's face was impassive as he played with a metal object in his hands. The silence was heavy and uncomfortable for both men. Jared, being the bigger man in most every way....acted accordingly, he made the first gesture.
"Thank you for being on time. Everything put away?"
Dark bangs flopped against a smooth brow.
"Whatcha got there?"
Todd mutely held up the bolt without looking up. Jared shook his head, not sure of Todd's mood. He seemed oddly quiet, in spirit as well as voice. Not the normal angry silence he'd become used to. The kid seemed introspective tonight. Rightly so after this afternoon but there was none of the anger or even resentment Jared expected Todd to return with. Just this odd sullen detached mood. Looking closely at the boy, Todd seemed downright self-conscious and a little nervous. Jared could see how the boy might feel uneasy right now. He called no attention to it. He would let Todd think about it, reconcile himself to it.
"Hungry?"
Shrugging, Todd looked away, down the hall. "I could eat."
Jared continued to prepare the steaks, Todd didn't move. He just leaned dejectedly against the wall. Todd's timidity was beginning to chip away at Jared's resolve to be firm. Jared was positive this brat had no idea of how appealing he could be. His big puppy dog eyes, sad and shiney. It was a good thing he was unaware. Some people just knew how to use charm and good looks as a tool or weapon. Not Todd, he was completely ignorant of himself and Jared was infinitely grateful, it was difficult enough to fend off Todd's natural appeal as it was.
"Dinner won't be done for an hour or so. Steak sound okay?"
At first Jared didn't think Todd heard him. He just stood there for the longest time, silent as a statue. Finally his head lifted and he flicked Jared just the briefest glace. His insecurity unveiled in their dark depths.
"Can I take a shower before dinner?"
Slowly wiping his hands off on a towel, Jared leaned on strong arms over the counter and looked intensely at Todd. "You do not have to ask me permission to take a bath, shower or a _s_h_i_t_. This is your home. Nothing has changed that, Todd,....nothing. All we did this morning was abolish fighting, not hygiene."
Jared's weak attempt at levity failed. Not that he expected otherwise. Just hoped. Todd pushed away from the wall and nodded. He walked away down the hall. Jared watched the silent boy leave, more than a little concerned.
The hot shower felt good, Todd let it flood over his head, down his face and chest and back as he braced himself by his arms against the tiled wall of the shower. As good as it felt he couldn't shake the unease. Todd felt odd, detached and very ....tired.
That's it. I'm just tired.* Somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind that little voice scoffed at his easy explanation. Todd being the obstinate man that he was, clung to the easy answer. Far better than any more soul searching. Todd had more than he could stomach of that. Later as he dried off he was aware that his bottom no longer hurt really. There was just an odd tight sensation to the skin. He got dressed in only sweats and clean socks; Todd left his room and returned to the kitchen. There was this weird gnawing in his gut that had nothing to do with dinner. In fact it robbed him of his appetite.
The kitchen was empty. Todd's ears picked up on a noise. It almost sounded like....music....almost. Following the sound to the rooftop door, Todd stepped out into the early evening air. It was filled with the soulful whine that only an electric guitar could make....one that was played well.
Stepping around the base of his favorite spot on the roof, the air conditioner unit. Todd found the source of the music. Jared was out here with a single large black box amp and guitar just a few feet away. His back was to Todd. Jared was facing the setting sun, like he was lulling it to bed. Jared was leaning backwards at the waist, a pained expression on his handsome face. He was lost to it. Todd hopped up on his perch and listened. Jared was really good; good as any he had ever heard. Jared's fingers worked their frantic magic, making the guitar float from screaming, then mellow, down to almost a whisper.
Jared never saw or heard his audience show up. When he turned around he was surprised to find his little rebel sitting crossed legged on the air conditioner, eyes closed, body rocking to his music. Jared played uninterrupted, letting Todd drift along. That was until the night breeze picked up and he saw the boy shiver. Dark lashes lifted when the music stopped. Todd found himself looking into Jared's piercing eyes. Smiling Jared hoisted the guitar off his shoulders.
"Ah, found out my little secret. I'm a rock star wannabe."
There was no answering smile from Todd but he did surprise Jared in spite of that. "You're good."
"Thanks."
Another shiver racked Todd's slender frame. Todd was only in his sweats with two, white, sock-covered feet sticking out, damp hair in a wild mop.
"Okay, concerts over. You get yourself inside, kiddo."
Jared coiled up his amp cords and waved Todd down to him. He handed the boy the guitar and hefted the amp himself. Shaking his head at Todd.
"What I do now?"
"Boy, are you trying to get sick?"
"No."
"Your hair is still wet and you're freezing."
Todd's upper body was naked and goosebumps showed all over, even through his matching tribal bands.
"Inside. March, before you freeze solid," Jared ordered good-naturedly.
Leading the way without argument, Todd carried the guitar inside. Jared noted that the sweats were a bit too big. They hung low on Todd's hips. The tattoo peeked out and tortured Jared with glimpses of itself and the whiter skin of Todd's buttocks. He was relieved to see that the belting he gave the kid earlier left no visible reminder. Proof he had been very lenient on the boy. Dinner was very quiet; Todd was practically a mute throughout. The kitchen clock was unusually loud as it ticked towards 8:00 pm.
Jared watched Todd closely. He was deep in thoughts that seemed troubling. Todd's fork made intricate designs in his mashed potatoes and seldom found it's way to his mouth. Finally Jared had to scold him to eat.
"Boy, I better see at least half that T-bone go in your mouth, along with some veggies."
Todd's brown eyes flickered a defiant look. Never-the-less he put food on the fork and ate. It tasted good. Steak was something Todd could only remember eating a handfull of times, the veggies he could live without....in fact he had. His appetite just wasn't up to it but he managed an attempt to please Jared....totally confused why he didn't tell the tank where he could stick the steak. The pain of the belting he got was long gone but the memory was still sharp, wisely Todd listened to his inner voice.
Satisfied with the amount the kid downed Jared cleared the counter. "Wanna set up the chess board?"
It was early yet. Todd felt sleepy but awake, he felt like he could sleep but he was wide-awake at the same time. Maybe a game would get his mind off himself. "Whatever."
Not long into the game it was very clear to Jared the kid just didn't have his mind on it. Wherever his mind was it wasn't a vacation spot.
"Want to talk about what happened today."
Without looking up or any hesitation, Todd answered. "No."
I asked for that* Jared thought to himself. "Hmmm. Let's try that again. What was that between you and Mouse this morning?" Todd shrugged.
"Todd, you just don't go around hitting people for no reason."
"Who said I didn't have a reason?"
Still not looking up from the board Todd just fiddled with his knight.
"Well, you're sure as hell not sharing it?"
"Guess I'm selfish that way."
The temptation to pull Todd over his lap and spank that insolent attitude out of him and take his time doing it, almost proved to be too irresistible. Jared smacked his hand down on the board upsetting the pawns instead. "You know, I've absolutely had it with this smart ass, tough guy, _s_h_i_t_. Just once I'd like a straight answer....just once."
Todd flinched under that burning emerald glower.
"I've been as patient as I know how to be with you. Well that's about to end....abruptly. I want an answer and I best get a good one unless you want another busting. Now tell me, why did you hit Mouse?"
Sitting there not making a sound, Jared watched Todd's emotions physically manifest themselves right before his eyes. Todd's face was a kaleidoscope of emotions. The boy's complexion paled and his breathing was so shallow that his lips had darkened to a slight shade of purple. His expression was confused anger but his eyes, those brown, deep pools of exposed soul, gave away the pain and fear.
Todd never answered but just sat like a frozen lump. Judging by the look in Todd's eyes the kid had mentally checked out... almost. Jared reached out and removed the chessboard and moved to sit on the coffee table closer to Todd. Eyes dark as coal flashed resentment then looked away.
Jared could see Todd starting to drift again to wherever it was he goes. Calmly he sat down in front of the kid whose eyes would drop to the floor or look anywhere but at him.
"Todd, just talk to me, tell me what happened."
It took several attempts to swallow the lump forming in his throat as Todd fought the odd heaviness in his chest. He felt helpless under that green gaze. Sensing the shift in the boy, Jared pushed harder.
"Why did you hit Mouse."?
"I....didn't...."
Frowning at Todd's halted words. "You didn't hit him?"
Brown eyes rolled in frustration. Jared took the hint and gave him more time. "I didn't....mean to. The dude just startled me and the next thing I knew I....hit him."
Jared placed a light hand over Todd's fisted ones. "How do you feel about that?"
A tear slid down trembling lips. Todd quickly turned away and whipped roughly at his eyes. It took him a while to answer. Jared gave him all the time he needed. He could see Todd's throat work for speech. It was a while before he could speak.
"Like _s_h_i_t_....I....hate it."
Todd's cheeks burned red in embarrassment, he hadn't meant to say that, not the truth. It just seemed to happen around Jared that he'd blurt secrets out.
"I'm....sorry....I didn't mean to hit him....it just....happened." Todd's voice broke and Jared could see how hard this was for him. Apologies for Todd came at high prices. Self-loathing the most costly. Jared leaned over and pulled Todd against his chest. Damp spikes of hair tickled Jared's chin and nose. Todd surprised them both by not fighting the comfort Jared offered. Inside Todd was all confused. He was suppose to be tough and cold but he couldn't resist Jared's comfort. Especially when it felt good. The scent of Jared was intoxicating for Todd, he didn't think there was another sent like it on the planet.
"You might feel like it, Todd, but you are not _s_h_i_t_."
Todd stiffened but didn't pull away.
"It's Mouse you need to say sorry to. We took care of any strife between us earlier didn't we?....hmmm. Clean slate, Todd. That's how it works. You do wrong, you get corrected and go on from there."
Jared lifted Todd's head to look into the red-rimmed wet eyes. "Okay?"
All he got in answer was a shrug. It was probably as best an answer as he would get.
"Nothing has changed between us, Todd."
He gave Todd a spontaneous but chaste kiss on his forehead and let Todd pull away. Todd whiped at his watery eyes and sniffled some. That odd, heavy feeling he had all afternoon was suddenly gone, he felt only normal now....and normal meant also indignant. Jared saw the change and just reminded himself to enjoy the short moments of peace. Back to business.
"That happen much, Todd? You just lash out like that?"
"No."
That was a lie and both knew it. "Is that a lie, Ansley?"
"Maybe."
Green eyes narrowed sternly and a rugged jaw sternly set.
"Don't do it again, Todd."
There was a tone Jared's voice had that held some sort of power over Todd. He was the only one who could make Todd sweat bullets with butterflies in the belly with just his tone.
"Why didn't you say something? Tell me that's what happened. Why did you run?"
Ten tapered fingers ripped through dark hair in frustration. "What could I say? I just popped your boy rat in the face. Talk to you? Dude you were bent. And you ask me why I ran."
The kid started to become agitated. "Dude you should have seen the look on your face. I ran because I didn't want to get beat....is that what you want to hear? Would it have made any difference, Jared? I was going to get it wasn't I, because of the milk?"
Jared looked Todd in the eye. "There was a good chance, yes."
Todd's temper slipped. "I'm sooo _f_u_c_k_'n sick of that _s_h_i_t_!"
"If you don't want a repeat I'd cool it with the language. That temper of yours is way out of control....it's controlling you."
Todd got to his feet and walked to the giant windows that looked over Denver.
"Todd, you didn't and you will never get beat....you got whupped, spanked and admittedly not as hard as I should have. Nowhere near what you need. Until you learn to control your temper you can expect more spankings in the future."
Whirling around Todd snapped at him. "Bull _s_h_i_t_! It was _f_u_c_k_'n humiliating, you drag'n me around like that. Everyone knows I got my _f_u_c_k_'n ass beat."
Green eyes leveled a warning. "Todd, clean it up! Last warning."
Jared's voice boomed across the living room as he stood up to his full, intimidating height. Todd fought to rein in his temper and his language. The last thing he wanted was another round with the tank.
Seeing the capitulation in those furious eyes, Jared spoke more calmly. "We could have handled this amongst ourselves here in the privacy of our home. You could have just talked to me this morning about what had you so pissed off. Todd, you woke up just begging for it. You tossed that tantrum this morning out of thin air, you hit Mouse and instead of explaining anything, you ran from me. You humiliated yourself by running off like that. You ran, I caught you, and you're just _d_a_m_n_ed lucky I didn't whup your skinny ass right then and there for all to see. As for anyone knowing that you got your butt spanked, I'm sure they assumed I would see to your behavior and I did. Unfortunately for you, they know how this family deals with bad behavior. But it won't be front-page news tomorrow. We are a tight group here. What goes on with the family stays in the family. Humiliating you or degrading you has never been my intention. I'm sorry, Todd, I should have made that clearer."
Todd felt a tear slip down his cheek. Digging the heals of his hands angrily into his eyes. "Aw _s_h_i_t_! Not again. You're turning me into such a little bitch."
Jared softened. Todd's voice so choked thick with tears.
"Tears don't make you a puss, Todd. They are normal. It's the lack of tears and emotions that's wrong, not normal."
Pressing
his forehead against the cool window Todd groaned and banged his head
against it in exasperation. "Normal. Jared walked up close behind Todd, who turned
to face Jared. A cynical expression marring his boyish face. "You're
right, there would be nothing normal about spanking a man, however
that is not the case....a boy got spanked....not a man, Todd....a boy and that's very normal. Todd rolled his
eyes and looked disgusted. "Riiight." Placing hands on either side
of Todd against the window, pinning Todd between his massive arms,
Jared glowered over to him. "When have I ever lied to you? The teen's
shoulders just shrugged. He looked away but Jared grabbed his chin
and brought it back to face him. "Answer the question. Todd....when?" "I don't know....never....I guess." Todd answered hesitatingly. "That's right. When have
I ever not done what I said I would?" Huffing a breath of air Todd
answered tetchily. "What has....?" Jared cut Todd off
crossly. "Answer me." "You haven't, all right?" "Have I ever broke
a single promise to you?" "No, but....." "Uh uh,
no buts. Yes or no?" "No." Todd looked up at him. Jared's face
was so close, his chin was just inches from his nose. Green eyes burning
into him, it hit him that the tank had kept every promise he ever
made, each and every one. Most Todd would have preferred him to break.
He shook his head negatively. Jared moved away with what could only
be called a grunt. "Uh huh. I've never lied to you, I do what I
say I will and I keep my promises. So tell me why can't you trust
me and believe that I care about you?" Todd had no answer for that.
Each time he thought he had one they all started the same. *Everyone
else....all the others....* Jared stood
close by watching Todd, his brow puckered, his mouth trying to form
answers that would not come. "Do not put me in the category of everyone
else. Todd, I am not like anyone else. I'm just me, you need to learn
to judge me on that basis alone." Brown eyes blinked stunned. Did
Jared really know how to read minds? Jared got no argument from
Todd, just wide eyed confusion. Seeing how this evening was not going
to end all that great to begin with, Jared saw no reason to put off
some over due business. "Come into the study." Jared wasn't asking,
but it wasn't an order either. Todd followed. Jared directed Todd
to the leather sofa. Sitting down Todd watched Jared unlock his desk
and pull out a familiar thick folder. The larger man carried it over
to Todd and sat across the coffee table from him. "I'll be showing
this to the doctor tomorrow. I thought it only fair to let you know
ahead of time. Do you know what's in here." Todd's mouth was dry and
he could feel each heart beat. He had a very good idea what was in
that folder. He'd seen it before, but it was thicker now....a lot thicker. "If it has anything to do with me....it's none of your business." Todd's voice didn't sound as strong
as his words. Jared handed over the file. The boys face blanched and
he looked up at Jared. Pulling out a photo of himself, his face swollen
and bruised, Todd thrust it at Jared. "Where'd you get this?" His
young voice was low but his eyes flashed in anger. Jared leaned forward
on his arms. "If it has anything to do with you, Ansley, past or
present....it's very much my business. Tomorrow it will
also be the doctor's business." "I suppose everyone else knows,
too?" Jared watched Todd closely, he seemed more scared than angry....there was definitely fear underneath all that bluster. "Only
Brian, Deek and myself." Only....to Todd that was three
too many. He spent a majority of his time and energy to keep that
part of him forgotten and secret. "You got no right.....no
right." Todd was upset but he seemed to be keeping his cool. It
surprised Jared. "Kid, I have every right. As for Brian and Deek,
well they are family. They aren't going to send out a newsletter or
buy a billboard. It's a family matter and we deal with it and keep
it private in the family understand?" Jared pointed at the photos.
"There is nothing to be ashamed of in there, Todd." "What would
you know about it? All you've known is this _d_a_m_n_ ivory tower
so don't try your psycho-bull_s_h_i_t_ on me!" Todd snapped, he leapt
up and ran from the room. Jared sat there a moment until he heard
the metallic slam of the stairway door. Before Jared could chase after
the phone rang. "Yeah?....thanks, Herb. No that's fine.
Good night." Hanging up with a sigh of both relief and frustration.
The night guard called to let Jared know that Todd caught the elevator
on the 8th floor and was down in the garage. Jared was going to have
to do something soon about this boy's habit of running. Todd didn't
go far and only to what Jared guessed Todd felt was his sanctuary,
well they was going to have to change that, too. Jared took the private
elevator down to the garage. It was dark and quiet down there when
he stepped out of the elevator. Just the emergency lights were on
and a dim glow from Todd's area. A loud bang echoed across the concrete
walls. Yep, Todd was down here. He was leaning over his worktable
with his head in his hands. His young body stiffened when he knew
Jared was there. Jared spoke with firm calmness. " "I know." Todd didn't
look up or move. "C'mon, kid, lets go, we still have some things
talk about." "Yeah. Why....what's the point?" Todd's
voice was muffled from under his hands. Jared could hear the tightness
in it. He carefully walked closer. "The point, Todd, is to get to
understand each other." "I'm cool with what I understand." Jared
sighed and spoke sternly. "That's not what I meant and you know it." Todd
stood up and faced Jared. His face pale and pinched. "Well, you can't.....no one can....all right....so drop
it." Walking stiffly away to a cabinet Todd began to nervously organize
the tools. "No I won't drop it, Todd. I want to get to know you.
I...." Something snapped in Todd, he spun around and
looked at Jared with open disgust. "Get to know me? Dude, you don't
want that." "Todd..." Jared was cut off. "No! You don't want
that....no one does!" "I do, I want...." "_f_u_c_k_
what you want....or think you want. 'Cause you _f_u_c_k_in'
don't want to know this.... Jared was getting frustrated by Todd's attitude and
his posture was openly hostile."You're wrong, Ansley. Let me decide
what I want or don't want to know." "Yeah? I'm wrong? Well, _f_u_c_k_
you! You don't know _s_h_i_t_, Jared...." "That's because you won't
let me in, Todd." Todd spun around and pitched his wrench against
the wall so hard it chipped the concrete. Fury barely contained, as
his body trembled from the force of it. "What the _f_u_c_k_ do you
want, Jared? What do you want to know? That at the age of 9 my life
went to _s_h_i_t_. That I was bounced around from state home to state
home until they found the Jefferson's? And stuck me in that _s_h_i_t_
hole." Jared would rather not have this discussion in the garage
with all the possible projectiles nearby but the conversation was
started and he was getting a strong and honest reaction from Todd.
For the same reason, he chose to overlook Todd's constant use of foul
language....temporarily. "That's a start." "_s_h_i_t_!
A start?....for you, asshole. It was the end for me.
My life ended the day the put me in that _f_u_c_k_ed up house. Jared,
dude you just....you just don't want to know." His
voice nearly broke. Jared moved towards Todd, who reacted violently
against any compassion. He picked up his toolbox and tossed it across
the garage, tools clanging loudly as the fell to the concrete floor. "Todd!" Todd
disregarded the warning and started to yell at Jared. His wasn't very
loud but cold and cruel. "You want to know me? You want to know _s_h_i_t_
about me? Like what dude? Like I used to cry myself to sleep every
_f_u_c_k_in' night or cry so much that the other kid's pounded the
_f_u_c_k_ out of me so hard I learned to be silent. Dude, I cried
so hard just hoping someone would come for me, that my mom would come
back for me. No one came, so I don't cry anymore, I ran out of tears,
Dude." Jared didn't believe that but didn't say anything. "So
what the _f_u_c_k_ do you want to know?....that I got
beat by my foster parents. I was never spanked....before
you....I was _f_u_c_k_in' beat to a pulp almost every
day. I'm a liar too. You asked me once if I ever broke anything. Yeah,
I had a broken arm not once but twice, see there." Todd spat that
out like it had some bearing on all this. Jared was not sure where
that came from. Besides the kid was a horrible liar. Before Jared
could say anything Todd continued his tirade. "First time one got
broke because I got in Stan's way once, funny thing was I wasn't even
much over five foot and didn't take up much room but it was enough,
so he tossed me down the hallway. Problem was I don't fly so good,
you know with gravity and all..Oh..wait. Jared was not given the chance to respond. "You
know why I hate hot dogs? Cause that sick _f_u_c_k_ Stan, thought
it was nice to have a kid jack him off while he watched TV and ate
the _f_u_c_k_n' things raw. I was only 9 dude!" Jared flinched his
stomach turned. Stanley Jefferson was a lucky man that he was already
dead. Jared could see himself tearing him limb from limb. "Hmmm
what else? Oh yeah, I don't like to eat at the dinner table because;
Stan said that I made him sick to his stomach when I ate. My foster
mom fed me at the coffee table for the next three years before he
came home. That is when she remembered to feed me. I wasn't' allowed
to hang out with anyone much and if I did they better be white, or
I'd get the _s_h_i_t_ beat out of me. This the kind of _s_h_i_t_ you
want to know, Jared. You want more? " Todd's fury increased. Jared
just stood as calm and quiet as he could. Wounded animals were most
dangerous when cornered and Todd was the same. Todd couldn't stop
himself. He was nearly screaming out things he had told no one...ever.
He found a certain cruel satisfaction in unleashing his demons at
Jared and seeing his shocked reactions. It fed his anger he knew he
was out of control it. He was scaring himself, he couldn't rein it
in or stop what he was saying but at the same time it felt good. "Like
how I got these..." Todd jerked up his shirt and exposed the faint
scars on his ribs. "Gift from Stan, for not washing his car clean
enough. _f_u_c_k_ dude, you don't want to know this _s_h_i_t_ man.
You don't want to hear that he would pin me down and use his cigarette
to brand me for being sloppy with his car or because he got a wild
hair up his ass. He liked it when I screamed....so I
would piss him off by not crying or screaming. Didn't always work....he had lots of ways to make you scream. Happy now, Jared?.... do you know enough yet?" Again Jared wasn't given any chance
to speak. "No?....more?....Oh I got more,
I got lots more....He beat his wife when I wasn't handy
or if I was unconscious, see he got off on making us scream. No fun
if we were out cold. Stan pulled me out of school because he said
I was too stupid to learn anything. The _f_u_c_k_er even shot my dog!
Do you have any idea what that does to a little kid. Dude, he shot
my _f_u_c_k_ing dog!" Todd's voice cracked harshly. "I'm so _f_u_c_k_ed
up, Jared. See you don't know me! You don't want to know me! No one
does!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. Todd was so out of control
that he was laughing and crying at the same time. Todd began to tear
the place apart, any object within reach became airborne. Jared watched
the kid destroy the work area he had worked so hard on. He was tempted
to stop him, but Todd's rage was so ferocious he stayed back, not
because he was afraid, he was not. So far nothing had been aimed at
him. He kept his distance to let Todd's rage have free rein and burn
it's self out. It was a very long time before that happened. Exhaustion
killing the fight and most of Todd's temper. With his anger receding
and rational thought returning, he backed up to the wall and slid
down it to the floor. He was breathless and trembling, he looked over
at the large man standing just a few feet from him. Jared hadn't moved,
hadn't done anything to stop him. Why should he, Todd thought? He
was probably wondering how to get rid of him now. Panic took root
and started to grow again. "It wasn't just the Jefferson's, in the
state homes I learned to steal and to fight. You get beat up enough
you learn to make the first move. I got smart, take out the big dog,
get the first punch in, make it count and your leader of the pack."
Todd began to work himself back up to another rage. "On the steet,
I learned that adults were gullible and easy marks for a kid with
a pool stick. I'd sneak out and hustle games in the bars, if I lost
I'd pick them clean when they got drunk." This time he began to
bang his head in agitation on the concrete wall behind him...hard.
Now Jared stepped in. Tossing around some tools was one thing but
to let Todd hurt himself was out of the question. Just as he moved,
Todd jumped to his feet. His eyes had a wild look to them. "Don't!
Don't touch me! You don't care, no one does! There's nothing to care
about! Just let me go! I lie and I steal, sell drugs and have done
worse than those things too....I....I....I've done other things for money...see you don't want to know
me....no one does. Just leave me the _f_u_c_k_ alone!" Todd's
voice cracked up and was shrill sounding. He was practically hysterical.
Jared stepped in closer hands raised in open gesture. "Todd, you're
wrong, I do want to know you?" "Bull_s_h_i_t_! Bull_s_h_i_t_! You
just want a little bitch boy....!" Jared's
hand snaked out so fast Todd never saw it coming. It slapped him across
the face making him stumble back a step. It was mostly sound but hard
enough to bring him up short. A sharp sting covered one side of Todd's
face. His hand moved on it's own to cover his throbbing cheek, there
was pain but not as much as one would think with the sound the slap
had and just a slight heat. He was startled; all the rage was instantly
replaced with shock and a good deal of fear. Jared looked at the
boy who stood in front of him blinking at him with a stunned expression.
Bangs hanging down in his watery brown eyes. He didn't hit Todd hard,
he wouldn't. He only smacked him hard enough to sting and get his
attention. Now that he had it, he grabbed a fistful of Todd's shirt
and jerked the boy up on his toes to get in his face. A bright red
handprint visible on his left cheek. "Listen and listen well...Toyboy." Todd
flinched and blushed red hot at that name. The icy tone from Jared,
chilling him, he was about to really get it now. He closed his eyes
tight and waited. All he got was a hearty shake. "You will look
at me. There will be no more of the crap, Todd, it's done. Bury it
and bury it deep....now! You hear me?" A finger jabbed
him painfully in the chest, all he could do was nod yes. He saw the
warning, Jared's hand aimed for his butt, before the tank could really
clobber him Todd quickly found his voice. "Yeah....yes." Shoving
Todd back against the wall he let go. Strong arms crossed over a large
chest. Todd looked hesitantly up into a stern face, he couldn't hold
the gaze from those eyes for long. "Seems I've heard that before.
I mean it, Ansley. I will clean your clock if you ever say that again." Jared
grabbed the elfin chin and tilted it up to make eye contact. He could
feel the trembling in the chin, red-rimmed eyes flooded with tears
pride wouldn't let loose. "Todd, I don't want a bitch boy, boy toy,
pony boy or any other nasty term your brain is conjuring up. Just
you....nothing and no one else. Don't look away from
me. I do want to know you. I do care, very much. Don't ever presume
to tell me....little man....what I want
or don't want. You haven't been on the planet long enough to know
what you want let alone what I might." Dropping his hand Jared backed
out of Todd's space and looked around the garage then back to the
apprehensive face watching him. Pointing at the destruction he pinned
Todd with a stern look. "I'm going back upstairs. You have one hour
to fix this place back up and get your tail back home or you'll be
sleeping on your belly and eating breakfast on your feet. Then we
are going to finish our talk. Am I understood?" Swallowing a lump
the size of baseball Todd found his voice. "Yeah." After Jared left,
Todd slid back down the wall and buried his head in his arms and allowed
himself some self pity and a few tears. Exactly an hour later Todd
found Jared in his study when he got back to the penthouse. He felt
unsure of himself. Looking at the large man sitting at the desk he
got a weird tight feeling to his gut. "Get it done?" "Yeah." Jared
stood up from his desk and walked over to the boy. He lifted Todd's
chin to inspect his face for any bruising. "Still sting?" Jared
asked. The cheek was now just faintly pink. "No." "Is that another
lie?" Lifting the chin higher to glare deep into the dark round
eyes. Todd winced at the implication and the tone Jared used only
tightened his guts more. "Yeah, it stings a little." Jared pulled
Todd into his arms and rested his head on the top of Todd's. Todd
stood stiffly in his embrace. "I don't want to ever hear that garbage
again. Do you know why?" Todd just shook his head. "Because it's
disgusting and disrespectful, to you. That I will not put up with.
I won't allow anyone to talk about you like that, not even yourself.
It's not true now is it? Have I ever treated you like that?" "No." "Then
it's understood that there will be no more of that....ever
again?" "Yes." Came the muffled answer from Jared's shirt. "Okay,
now go sit down on the couch." Todd did as he was told, rubbing
his hands nervously on his lap. Jared stared at him a moment. "Why
didn't you tell someone about what was going on at home?" Todd scoffed
at that. "I did....once. I told a teacher, he said he
was going to call the cops." "Did he?" Todd leaned forward on
his arms. "No....before he could I told him I lied and
made it all up." Frowning in confusion Jared shook his head. "Why?" "What
do you mean why? If he called the cops I'd be put in another group
home or a camp. Better to be beat by two people you know than twenty
you don't." Jared sat there stunned. He couldn't argue the logic
but to come from someone so young and jaded. "Did he believe you?" "Uh
huh. Too well. He got got pissed at me and called my house and told
them what I had said, even called them in for a....what
do you call it....consultation. Guess he thought I was
messed up. Well I got a hell of a consultation later that's for sure." "Didn't
the teacher see any bruises?" Todd shook his head. "Nah....we just moved....again. Look, dude, I....I don't want to talk about this....okay?" Squirming
on the couch like he couldn't get comfortable, Todd started to get
up. "Just sit down and relax, Todd. I know you don't like to talk
about this. I know it's emotional and scary for you okay but some
of this might come up tomorrow at the doctors." Todd abruptly stood
up but before he could begin to loose his temper Jared shoved him
back down into the couch cushions. "NO! You will sit down....calmly. You will listen and you will NOT lose your temper,
no more tantrums for the night unless you'd like to sleep on your
stomach," Jared snapped at him. "It's not like Doc Roy has to know
everything ....just the medical stuff, like broken bones,
shot records and, Todd, he'll need to know about the abuse. NO don't,
don't you do it." Todd had got up to leave. Jared's tone changed
his mind, he sat back down and stared at the floor. It was so hard
to sit there; Todd could feel the panic inside him like it was alive,
as his deepest fears were slowly revealed like the skin of an onion
layer by layer. Exposing that part of him that he spent a lifetime
protecting and hiding. "Todd, he's already guessed that there were
some issues already." At Todd's confused expression Jared clarified.
"When he gave you that little check up your first day here? He saw
the scars and knew. He's told no one, Todd, and he'll tell no one." Content
that Todd would stay put Jared asked some questions that have been
driving him nuts since their time up at the cabin. "Todd I need to
know some things. I'd like to talk about it privately now. Unless
you want to wait for the doctor and answer them then." "What if
I don't want to talk about them." Cool green eyes drilled into him....the discussion was not open for debate. Todd couldn't hold
that burning gaze he dropped his eyes. Jared saw the resentment but
Todd would cooperate....under duress. "You know, you
have made a couple loose remarks on "other" things you have done for
money. Other than drug peddling and hustling pool." Still not meeting
Jared's eyes the boy sat still as a rock. "Todd have you hustled
something other than pool games?" Jared waited. Brown eyes flickered
up under thick bangs. "Todd there is a record of solicitation. I
need to know about this." Todd's face paled. Wet eyes pleaded with
Jared. It killed Jared but he returned a cold glare. Todd gave in
but he rushed to explain. "I never....um...._f_u_c_k_ed anyone....like guys....I
swear it, dude....really, Jared." Jared's heart flipped.
Todd was so adamant about that like he needed Jared to believe him.
"Then what did you do, Todd?" Todd slouched deep in the cushions.
And rubbed his face with his hands. This was so hard....he didn't want to have this conversation with Jared....ever. The man across from him made it impossible to keep secrets.
He just had a way of leaching them out. He must have taken too long
to answer, Jared's voice rumbled making him flinch. "Todd? I'd like
to talk to you man to man. We can do it man to boy....if
you get my drift?" Todd did and he shifted involuntarily on the
couch. "I smashed up my bike....so I couldn't do my
job....so I had no money coming in. I was um....at this club and this dude just walks up and offered me cash
if I would....would....jack him off. So
I did....just with my hand." Jared kept his temper
and the raging jealousy banked low. Todd squirmed under the stern
emerald glare. "Just that one time? Is that when you got caught?" No
longer able to meet Jared's eyes Todd looked his feet. "No. Seems
word kinda got around that I was a willn'. It was good money. I hand
pumped this other dude off and one other wanted to watch me yank mine." Green
eyes narrowed angrily at Todd. "Do you know the danger you...." "Yeah, I do all right? I know. I found out fast. This
one old dude got a little rough. He wanted to tie me up...._f_u_c_k_....er forget that. I got the fuc....hell out. And before you yell at me, dude. I've never done
that _s_h_i_t_ again." Todd's face was so earnest that Jared had to
believe him. He has always had some suspicions about this and was
relieved that this was the extent of it. "So you never...." "NO....Never. I've never been with a dude. Not
like that. I've told you that." "You have said that before. What
the hell does that mean....not like that?" A bright
read blush heated Todd's features. "I've messed around a little. A
little mutual rubb'n and tuggn' ya know?" Jared grinned, he did
indeed. "I'm confused....then how did you get picked
up for solicitation? Todd realized pulling the wool over the tank
was not possible. He started to put together a fast explanation....but Jared beat him to it. "I strongly suggest the truth, Ansley." Busted!
Taking a deep breath Todd told Jared that he got a job at a club in
Phoenix. He would find and procure party favors, whatever drug the
crowd was into that night. He was out in the alley with a dealer when
the policeman saw them. The older guy put a serious lip lock on him
and giving them a cover, made it look like something else was going
down. The cop saw them all but doing it right there and the money
in the guy's hand and just added up the wrong formula. Todd was busted
for solicitation but he was able to give the cop the slip at a gas
station. He talked the cop out of the cuffs and skinny'd out of the
bathroom window. Jared made a couple mental notes. Todd looked a little
sheepish. "Do we have to tell the doctor about this?" Jared expelled
the breath he didn't know he was holding during all that. Poor Todd
looked pale as a ghost. "No. I don't see the need to. I had to know,
Todd. There's tests that would need doing otherwise. I'm sorry if
you're embarrassed. I know you've done things to survive but holy
_s_h_i_t_, Todd! You have chosen some of the most...." "Stupid?
Is that what you're going to say?" "No, reckless. That 's what I
was going to say. It's like you have no regard for yourself, Todd." Todd's
only response to that was just a shrug. Todd's emotions were getting
out of hand....he was loosing his grip on them and he'd
worked so hard for control. Tears spilled over his eyelashes....again. Todd lost his hold on his temper. "What is with this
_f_u_c_k_'n place....I've done nothing but bawl like
a bitch since I got here. I'm sick of it." He bent low over his
knees and grabbed handfuls of hair and rocked fitfully. Odd hiccup
like gasps came from Todd. Jared moved over to sit next to him. He
rubbed Todd's bowed back, making no attempt to hold him. Instinctively
knowing it would be met with resistance. "That's not true. You haven't
and nowhere near like a bitch, so knock that crap off....unless you want something to really make you cry." Jared's goofy
grin took all the sting out of his threat. Todd just shook his head.
"Hey, this is tough and very personal....I know that,
I respect that. The only one with problems with any tears is you." Todd
straightened and took a deep broken breath, scrubbing his eyes with
his fists. "I told you....I don't cry." Jared refrained
from arguing that everyone did at one time or another regardless of
control issues or age. "I didn't bring up your past to piss you off,
embarrass you, ruin your life or make you cry. I just thought it was
fair that we talk about it now before tomorrow at the doctors. No
surprises. That's all. I know you don't want to talk about any of
it. But, Todd, it's burning you alive. You got to unload that garbage
sometime." Todd sat up dry eyed and stone faced. "Nah....keeps me warm." Jared wasn't buying any of that but it was late
and Todd was showing signs of exhaustion from his day. There was a
lethargy that washed over the kid. That temper tantrum down in the
garage really took it's toll on the boy. The dark circles under his
eyes returned and he was looking a little pale and rough around the
edges. "C'mon....bed time. We have an early morning." Todd
got to his feet and walked towards the door, he turned around. "Look,
Jared, I've really had all I can take of this playing house okay....just call it squares on a good deed and let me head out instead." Placing
large hands on Todd's slender young shoulders Jared turned him back
around and propelled him towards the door. "We aren't playing house,
Todd. You're staying and this isn't pretend it's the real deal. I
think you know that. You wouldn't be afraid of going to the doctor
tomorrow would you?" Todd tried to spin around but Jared kept his
grip and steered him to his room. "_s_h_i_t_. No I ain't afraid....just don't.... see the point." Jared said nothing
and walked with Todd to his room. "The point, Ansley, is to make sure
your healthy. When was the last time you saw a doctor....besides here?" Todd rolled his eyes as Jared pulled back his
sheets....guess he was getting tucked in. He was too
tired to fight it and he'd loose so he just got in and let Jared fuss
with the bedding around him. "Dunno....a couple times
in Arizona, had a couple brutal wrecks, nothing broke but banged myself
up real good. Last time anyone made me go was just before I ran....left Arkansas." Jared began to pick up Todd's room, his
shoes, and coveralls were on the floor still. "That long ago huh?" Todd
folded his arms behind his head. He even grinned....only
it wasn't a pleasant one. "Yeah, Stan broke my left arm that time." Jared's
froze in his cleaning. "What?" Todd moved an arm from behind his
head and pulled the blankets off revealing his naked chest and torso.
"Yeah. I paid him back for these." "Huh?" He indicated the group
of small round scars on his side. "Yeah, I fixed that asshole Stan
and that _f_u_c_k_ing car he loved so much...._f_u_c_k_in'
piece of _s_h_i_t_ anyway." Tempted to call Todd on his language
but the boy was talking and openly so Jared let it go for now. "I'm
confused." "He caught me out in the garage messing with his dirt
bike, I'd sneak it out when he was gone, he'd get real bent over that....well I didn't plan this time too good. He caught me sneaking
it back in the garage. He pounded me into butter that time but I made
him work for it, he had to chase me around the garage first, really
got him bent. He must have dropped his cigarettes when he was chasin'
me, 'cause I found them and then something clicked. I lit one and
left it burning on his car seat, then hid in my room. Hour or so later
the whole _f_u_c_k_in' garage is in smoke and the car is on fire.
It was _f_u_c_k_'n great." Jared sat down in the desk chair. The
smile that lit up Todd's face was one of maybe three genuine smiles
he'd ever seen on the boy and gone as fast as it came. "What happened
then?" "Oh not much right away, other than that fat fart hosing
down the garage and car....he saved the garage or most
of it but well....the car was _f_u_c_k_in' toast. He
and the neighbors got it out before it blew....dude that
was awesome when it did. I'll bet that stupid Taurus is still spread
all over the county, parts just never came back down. I came out side
just to watch him freak." Scarcely believing his ears, Todd an arsonist.
Jared asked for more details. "Where was the fire department?" A
rude noise escaped Todd's lips. "_s_h_i_t_....the town
could go up in flames before they got it together....not
really their fault....we lived in a rough neighborhood
and they were about an hour away." Jared just made small noises
to encourage Todd to continue. "Stan took just one look at me and
he knew. Yeah that was pretty much the end of the fun. Guess the stupid
grin on my face gave me away. He beat the living _s_h_i_t_ out of
me." Concentrating very hard on keeping his voice steady Jared asked
Todd if that was when he got his arm broke. "Yeah. He chased me down.
Bonny was there...." "Bonny?" "Huh? Oh that's his
wife." "She had to stop him from killing me and he was trying. Dude
hit me with every thing he could find, man. He grabbed some tire chains
off the wall, still smoking from the heat and nailed me with them.
Got me a couple times pretty good. Like a little idiot I tired to
block with my arm, the chains snapped the bone. Hurt like a mother
but it was worth it." Jared could no longer keep his cool. He got
up and paced the room. "Worth it?....how the hell was
that worth it?" A smile that could only be described as smug lit
Todd's face. "I told you, I got even. Cops show up right? Here I am
bleeding and bruised, arm all _f_u_c_k_ed up. I told Stan that if
they turn me in for starting the fire, I'd turn them in for child
abuse. Yeah, I was a walking billboard of their tender loving care.
Stan told the police that he must have left a cigarette in the car
and that was that." Jared stared incredulously down at Todd. "They
believed that? With you all beaten up like that?" "Sure, I told
them I wrecked my bike and Stan was so worried about me he left his
lit cigarette in the car. Dumb asshole cops believed it. Why wouldn't
they? We were the all American family. They believed me enough to
leave me there after they made sure I'd been taken to the emergency
station and fixed up. Didn't matter none, I was gone the next morning." Confused
Jared sat back down. "Gone? What do you mean gone?" "I stole Stan's
bike and headed west. Didn't matter where, as long as I left them
behind far behind. I left everything behind.... everything." Jared
wasn't sure what "everything" was but he had a good idea it was Todd's
way of saying he'd tried to leave his emotions and pain back there.
Todd sat up and frowned at Jared. "Dude, I can't stay in any one
place too long....ya know. I doubt he's tried to find
me but I ain't will'n to take the risk....if he catches
me, dude...." Jared looked solemnly at Todd. He sat
down on the bed and pushed Todd back into the pillows. Todd scowled
at the serious expression on Jared's face. "Todd, there is no reason
to run any more. I want you to listen to me. I should have told you
before and I can't honestly say why I haven't. The Jefferson's won't
be looking for you." A weird sensation washed over Todd. "They'Re
dead?" "Yeah." Jared waited and watched as Todd processed this.
He laid back and stared up at the ceiling. Just that cold expression
on his face. "When?" "Three years ago, in a car accident, he was
drunk." Todd lay quiet with his eyes fixed above him. "You all
right, Todd?" Liquid brown eyes look to Jared. Todd gave maybe his
most honest answer yet. "I don't know. Dude, never been happy someone
died before. Guess I'm more _f_u_c_k_ed up than I thought ?" Jared
left the bed and pulled the covers back up, Todd was covered with
goosebumps. He lightly grabbed Todd's chin. "Knock it off, you're
not _f_u_c_k_ed up, Todd. As for being happy? I don't believe that
you are....I think you're in shock and probably relieved
that he's gone and can't hurt you anymore....not that
he could if he was still alive." Moving the desk chair closer to
the bed Jared sat back down next to Todd and fussed with the long
bangs that always seemed to find their way into his eyes. "There
is no way I'd let him near you, but he's gone, Todd, they both are." Todd
let a long breath out his cheeks. He was suddenly very sleepy, enough
to allow Jared's petting and admit to himself he liked it. He was
being way too open around Jared right now but didn't care. He'd care
later. "I'm really sorry, kid, I should have told you sooner." Jared
looked so concerned....for him. It gave him a funny feeling
in his gut. He shook his head. "Nah, dude....I'm.....it's cool." Jared could see that Todd was not as cool as
all that. Todd's eyes fluttered, the boy was tired, it had been a
trying day for both of them. "Tired, buddy?" "Uh huh." "Close
those eyes and just sleep." Closing his eyes Todd seemed to drift
immediately to sleep....a troubled sleep.... Jared sat next to him while Todd slept. He stayed and continued
to rub his fingers though the dark hair, kept soothing till Todd stopped
his tossing and turning and finally calmed down. Taking one last look
at the sleeping boy Jared turned off the light and left the room.
He was sick to his stomach...Todd at the age of 12 rode his bike....a stolen dirt bike across the wastelands alone and with a
broken arm and a twisted soul. Jared tired to get something to drink
from the kitchen but his hands shook so badly he couldn't hold the
glass. Picking up the phone he automatically dialed Brian who, just
by the tone of Jared's voice, knew something was wrong and was on
his way over. When the penthouse elevator doors opened 30 minutes
later Jared was there waiting and he stepped in with Brian. The thick
doors no sooner closed when he slid down the carpeted wall and broke
down and sobbed, he didn't care that the security guards could see.
In fact they did and Herb shut off the monitor. Brian sat down next
to Jared and held his little brother in a manner that he hadn't in
years. Somewhere in the broken sobs Brian got the story of what Todd's
life had been like in his foster home. Rather, bits and pieces enough
to get the idea. It took Jared some time to calm down. "Thanks,
Brian....just needed to talk to someone." Brian pulled
Jared into a huge hug. "That's what big brothers are for. Todd sleeping
now?" Whipping at his eyes Jared nodded. "Sounds like you two
have had a rough day." "We've had better days. I just want to hurt
that man.....so bad, Brian, I can't stand it....I've never felt....this much hate." "He's dead,
Jared, can't hurt him now and more important he can't hurt Todd now." Jared
nodded his head. "I know....I know. No wonder that kid's
been such a hard case. He's never been allowed to get close to anything,
both parents gone, he's believed all this time that his mom dumped
him." "He ever talk about that." "No. I haven't pushed." Getting
up off the floor Jared helped Brian to his feet. "Can't really blame
him for being repressed. Ya know, Todd even told me that the sick
bastard shot his dog...._s_h_i_t_ the kid has even robbed
of the love of a pet." Tears started again to well up in Jared's
eyes. Brian took him by the shoulders and gave him a good shake. "Now
that's enough, listen to me. What's happened to Todd is horrible beyond
words....but it's done and over. You can't go soft now....not with that kid he would not appreciate it and just use
it against you. He needs help, Jared. What are you going to do now?
Let Todd's past continue to rule his life and yours?" Jared shook
his head. No, he was not going to let that happen. "Time to make
some tough decisions. You've already made the biggie; he's your legal
responsibility now. Don't you think it's time to roll up your sleeves
and get with the program? That boy is on the knife's edge of life.
He could go either way right now. He could easily use his past as
an excuse to go bad and we know many have and do. Thinking life owes
him something. You and I know that's not how it works. It's up to
you to push him over the right side. Just be there for him. Set his
little ass on the right path. You can't change his past Jared but
you _d_a_m_n_ well can his future. He's going to fight you for a while,
maybe even the whole way. So you might have to whup him the whole
way. Just get him there. You have back up, baby sister." Brian made
Jared chuckle a little. He was shaking off whatever it was that came
over him. "Hey, you're making progress." At Jared's rude snort
over that. Brian thumped him on the head. "Knock it off. You have.
Look you have taken him in....however unwillingly, curbed
his freedom, all but taken over his life, I'm sure that's how he sees
it. You have even whupped him a time or two....and for
the record far less than he deserves. I have even had a little chat
with him myself...." "So. What's your point, Brian?" The
look he got from his brother made him cower a little. "Sorry." "The
point, idiot, is that he's still here isn't he? Has he made so much
as a single attempt to run away? Just one?" Jared shook his head
negatively. "Don't you find that odd. If you ask me, I don't think
that boy knows what he wants. " "I think he is just waiting for
the right time." Brian couldn't argue that point. But he gave Jared
some food for thought. Jared and Brian spoke for a long time in the
elevator before Brian was sure Jared would be okay, gave him a long
hug and bonded as only brothers can and made his way back home, he
only lived 20 minutes from Jared's building. By then Jared was feeling
better, Brian was always good at making things clearer for him. He
was just tired and overwhelmed by the day's events. It had been a
very emotional day. With one last look in on Todd, Jared went to
bed himself. Tomorrow didn't hold much promise of being much fun either.
More stories by Frost Spinner