Subject: The Top Ten Reasons Why Not To Spank With The Brush.
I have decided in the interest of science, and so that future generations, should they stumble across what would by then be an historical document of unparalleled importance, may read about and analyze the horrors being inflicted upon the youth around this world under the guise of discipline and is being done so with an instrument that is innocently called the hairbrush. In doing so I have listed a few of the reasons as to why the brush is so distasteful if not downright vile. The reason(s) as to why some "older" adults continue to use this most barbaric of tortures I have yet to decipher.
10) It is an instrument that is commonly associated with childhood, pre-puberecance, and it's use on a boy aged 13 or older leaves him feeling childish and less than grown. It is the opinion of this author that if the boy is old enough to have pubic hair it's time he was punished like the young man he is! If he is to be punished, or much less told no, at all.
9) The use of the hairbrush seemingly always involves the baring of the boy. Bad enough his behind is now exposed to the wrath of his father and the striking blows that shall inevitably follow, but his genitals are as well. Something that to this day causes acute embarrassment in young males age 13 and up. Since when did embarrassment and punishment become kissing cousins?
8) At this point, if not before, and in many case long before, the 'boy' in question finds himself wincing at the sound of his own voice as it rises in pitch till he sounds all but nine or ten again, then cries out as he begs his father not to spank him and whines out what is consider by many men his lame excuse. Talk about feeling small? Whoa! And at least he, the boy or son has a reason as to why he did what he did. What's your excuse for spanking him? Well?
7) If my memory serves me correctly? And it does. Once he is ready for his spanking, meaning the boy is standing besides his father with his pants around his knees or ankles, it is only then that the lecture occurs in earnest. Now is this stupid or what? How is listening enhanced when this embarrassed from the public exposure of one's genitals?
6) When positioning his son or charge the father does so by leading him across his lap, my understanding is that this is done so simply to reinforce the fact that the boy has been acting like a child and therefore shall be treated like one. What's up with that anyway? Like getting a spanking with a belt or strap or paddle doesn't say that he's misbehaved?
5) Want to talk about a humbling experience? Try being a young man now laying across your father's knee yet trying tolook back over your shoulder as the inevitable "Dad? Please?" is utter as if by rote. Talk about a humbling no, make that humiliating experience for any one to have to endure, much less a young male, teenager on up, whom by now is seeing himself in the light of being a young man. Or what is commonly refereed to as "The Man" within the confines of a school and or his posse (also know as social pack). Explain to me how he can consider himself "The Man" when positioned over his fathers knee, bare ass exposed and about to be spanked?
4) Once in position, again this means draped over his father's lap, the dude is made to endure that moment that seemingly lasts forever, the one where both father and son reposition themselves and draw upon their inner strength. Well, news flash for you, like hello? What's with this their stuff? It's hell on the son. I mean lying there and feeling of so small while at the same time trying to find some inner resource to endure the pain that you know is coming. So what does the father do? Makes truly asinine statements like "It hurts me to have to do this you know." Well, then? Don't. Sheesh. How hard is it to figure that out?
3) It used to be, or so I have read, that in days gone by, that people were tortured by dunking, the rack etc. _d_a_m_n_. We must all be derived from wimps as there is nothing that compares to the brush! I mean bad enough before all is said and done that the boy in question has been reduced to a quivering mass of tremors, kicking and crying but trying to honestly describe the pain in one's ass is like trying to explain how the whole universise was at one time was compressed down to the size of a pin head. Good luck!
2) Ah. The dance. The ultimate horror. And no, we are not talking about the dance of the bumble bee here either! They, the bees, are choreographed if compared to the action that occurs once the boy is off his fathers lap! The action that ensues might only be visualized if one can picture Ozzy Osborne attempting to use a word with more then two syllables in it. Add to this the feeling, if you can still read through your tears, the utter horror a boys feels knowing his manhood, his source of pride and yes, now favorite toy, is flapping in the wind like a two year old waving bye-bye yet unable to do a thing about it. Is this the result the fathers of the world are truly hoping for? If so? We now know what happened to the descendants of those whole ruled during the inquisition years!
1) Gentleman, I shall grant you that word in the hopes that you have come to you senses, the _d_a_m_n_ thing, the brush, HURTS!! Period. What else really needs to be said? And we all know that you don't wish for us, your offspring, the fruitof your seed (oh brother!) to view you as you truly are, evil and demented torturers of the young and innocent now do you? No? Then do your son's and the generations that shall follow them a favor and burn those _d_a_m_n_ed instruments from hell!!